Saturday, May 10, 2008

I feel lesion-tastic!

I am going in for my six month return MRI, to see how the little fellows are doing. It is funny, but I feel pretty darned good. I have noticed that I still have some memory problems -- I have just taken to writing every.thing.down. Everything. I have a little steno pad that I use at work now and I write down everything that I have to do and what I have done, because I will completely forget things otherwise.

The memory loss is funny, because it is like the information never, ever existed. I wonder if what is damaged is my ability to create a little hook for grabbing information. I had to write a court report the other day and thought that I was going to have to write it from scratch, rather than just update and amend. One is considerably more work and I was not looking forward to doing it. Imagine my pleasure when I found a very recent copy of the same report, dated not three weeks before! Whoo hoo!

And then I opened the report and found it only half written. And then I scrolled down and found my name at the bottom. I started this report and have absolutely no recollection of having done so. None.


Things that big don't happen very often, but when they do, it is just surprising. I have always had a really good memory, and even if I don't remember things right away, if I see something, it will jog the memory loose and I will remember it. Odd when it doesn't. I think, if I took a while to think about it, I might remember starting the report, but it is not worth the effort, I don't think.

I will just keep writing stuff down in the meantime.

Other than that, just some slight problems with articulation, the occasional weird cognitive thingy. My favorite recently was when I was driving on a well-known stretch of the freeway and had no idea where I was. I could tell you I was going east on I-10, because I knew the exits, but the part of my brain that knew it was not sure. I had no sense of recognition. I actually saw the sign that said I was on the 10 eastbound, and it still felt foreign. It was a little scary, because I felt like I was on the wrong freeway. Even though I knew I wasn't. Weird, no?

I wonder how many lesions I have now?

I have evaluated two different people who have said that they cannot work because they have lesions in their white matter. One had six and one had 12.

At 20 and counting. Down, I hope.

Pray for me in the coming month. Will keep you posted.